stabbitystab: (Default)
janus lefevre ([personal profile] stabbitystab) wrote2017-03-25 12:24 pm
Entry tags:

Open Post




text; audio; video; action;
please use warnings in subject headers!
themes of violence are likely.

kathikon: (o31)

[personal profile] kathikon 2017-05-11 12:22 pm (UTC)(link)
[Arel closes his eyes when Janus speaks, feeling their lips, swollen by kisses, by Arel's mouth on them, on his ear, whispering into the shell of it. Under his fingers, Janus' heartbeat is fast and feels - happy, in a way, like Arel can tell. He can't, but he likes to think it is, happy and excited and comfortable. His index finger plays a rhythm in sync with it.]

Do you think it's a bad thing? To be a little illogical?

[Arel doesn't mind. He is pretty illogical himself and he knows it, guided by his emotions more often than not, letting them take over, even when they contradict themselves, from one moment to the other. It gives him the impression that he is being his best self, following his heart, instead of being led by his clan and their missions.]

I like it, myself. And it suits you.
kathikon: (o32)

[personal profile] kathikon 2017-05-12 02:59 pm (UTC)(link)
[Arel closes his eyes, processes the words. Yes, he knows - everything but utmost precision, in actions and thoughts, is a weakness. Anything keeping your hand from being as steady as it should be is a weakness. Emotions, gut feelings, all of it - weaknesses.

Arel cannot subscribe to this philosophy anymore. He's never thought he made a great Hunter anyway, better at intelligence gathering than cold-blooded kills, but now that his clan is gone, he feels like the tenuous tether he had to the ideology has been entirely snapped. And now... hearing Janus' words, there's a part of him that wishes he could burn it all down to the ground, and free people like them.

He swallows hard. This isn't him.]


This - [He gestures between the two of them, then presses two fingers to Janus' chest again.] - this isn't about hits, and violence, and precision. This is messy, Janus. Not just the sex part, although that is definitely messy, but all of it is, too. You're not supposed to analyse your relationships with a clear eye and look at it as if it's another target. You're supposed to allow yourself to be blinkered by it, by what you're feeling. And it's - it's okay.

[He takes another deep breath.] You can separate the two. Be your analytical self when working, and allow yourself a small space for your feelings, and for messiness, when we're together. [He half-smiles, soft.]

It's not weakness. Not really. It's just - different.
kathikon: (o34)

[personal profile] kathikon 2017-05-17 09:04 am (UTC)(link)
[ You aren't afraid? The question feels like a thunderclap through Arel's mind, and the spell does flicker, the stars blurry for a moment before he focuses, pressing his tongue to the roof of his mouth for a moment. Is he afraid to make mistakes?

Every single moment of his life. This, right now, is probably a mistake, all the things Arel can't tell Janus hanging heavily on his thoughts. Will Janus hate him if they ever learn the truth? That Arel's a liar, a coward, nothing as lovely as Janus like to build him up in their head. That Arel is a mess, hiding away what he really is to them.

Arel hates himself for it; he wouldn't begrudge Janus if they did, too. Janus - too good for him, probably, sitting above him without a clue, and it's unfair. Words clog up Arel's throat for a moment as he traces the incredible curve of Janus' waist with a reverent finger, trying to swallow it all down.]


I'm always afraid. Everybody makes mistakes, Janus. The harder part is forgiving - yourself, and others.

[Hypocrite.]
kathikon: (o21)

[personal profile] kathikon 2017-05-23 08:33 am (UTC)(link)
[Arel didn't expect Janus to move so quickly - graceful and effortless and it shouldn't surprise him, they are a Hunter, after all, but it does anyway. Arel never wants to stop being surprised by Janus and their sudden decisions, like they're spur of the moment when he knows oh so well that they've been weighing pros and cons, making sure that their hands are precise and their fingers aren't shaking.

Janus isn't about making mistakes.

Arel lets his eyes drift closed when Janus leans down, eyelashes fluttering as he exhales loudly, pleased, his dick giving a hearty lurch in his underwear, jumping from being mildly interested in Janus' weight on him to being fully interested in Janus' mouth on him.]


Tell me about the things you like. [Arel says, his voice rougher now, need transpiring in his tone and his words. It's not that being given compliments turns him on, but there's something about the way Janus voices things, so matter-of-factly and endlessly endearing that keeps on capturing Arel's attention, and Arel wants to hear more of it.]
kathikon: (o39)

yes we did

[personal profile] kathikon 2017-05-30 10:21 am (UTC)(link)
[ A parrotfish. Janus may be the strangest creature Arel has ever been given the chance to touch, but he is endlessly endeared and charmed by their metaphor and analogies; there's something so earnest and sweet about them, and Arel smiles, reaching down to brush fingers through Janus' hair.

His words about Emily makes Arel suck in a breath, stopped and amazed, a little. He stares at the stars on the ceiling, lets Janus' words - too kind, too honest, piercing right through every single one of Arel's lies like they know, like they're fishing him right out from underneath all the layers - wash over him.

He feels like he can't breathe, and that's why he pulls up at Janus' arms, getting them to move back up, to be able to kiss them, deep and hard and full of need, suddenly hungry. He doesn't deserve any of these words, any of Janus' own kindness. It burns through his veins, too much to handle, and when he pulls away from the kiss, he's panting, and the stars have faded from the ceiling. ]


I don't deserve you. [ He doesn't know what else to say. He wishes he wasn't lying to them, every second of every minute of every hour of every day. He wishes he could say the truth. He can't. ]
kathikon: (o16)

[personal profile] kathikon 2017-06-06 09:55 am (UTC)(link)
I'm not, [ Arel replies between kisses, finding himself suddenly hungry - not for food, either, but for Janus, just for Janus. He kisses them with that hunger bubbling in his belly, pushing him to hold onto their hair and angle the kiss, pushing him to dip his tongue inside their mouth, pushing him to touch, touch, touch, feeling starved for it.

His hips roll up into Janus', groaning into their mouth, his brain suddenly gone blank of anything else than his need for Janus. His free hand slides down along their back, to their arse, squeezing lightly when it reaches its destination. He pulls away from the kiss with a wet sound and a harsh breath, his lungs on fire. ]


I'm just being honest. And, fuck, do I want you.
kathikon: (Default)

[personal profile] kathikon 2017-06-16 10:50 am (UTC)(link)
[ Arel frowns, his free hand tracing the features of Janus' face; sharp cheekbones, jutting jawline, soft lips, a nose that looks like it should have been broken a number of times. Inquisitive eyes. Perfectly arched brows. Creases on his forehead. ]

Let's not. It shouldn't be. A competition, I mean. It's more like... A team thing. We're a team. We work together, towards the shared goal of mutual orgasms. Yeah?

[ Love is sure a competition outside of this; this tiny bubble they've created right now. Outside of it, people compete for attention, try to prove themselves as the most lovable, the best lovers, the most entertaining friends. A constant competition for time and attention. Arel only gets ahead sometimes due to his body; a body he didn't even choose.

Sometimes, he feels like he's barely his own person. ]


There's enough competition in the world, Janus.
kathikon: (Default)

[personal profile] kathikon 2017-06-22 08:48 am (UTC)(link)
[ Maybe this is what Arel should have expected, when he asked Janus on a date. A proper date, with food and romance and privacy; maybe he should have known. He should have known that they would slip into something like this, intimacy between moments fueled by adrenaline and hormones, words whispered like they didn't mean much, when they meant everything.

Arel looks at Janus, brushes his fingers through their hair, down along their temple, a tangle of feelings stuck in his throat as his eyes travel all over their face. ]


You. You make me smile. [ It sounds stupid and cliché - a cheesy line even for Arel, who wears this kind of cheesiness on his sleeve unashamedly. But the situation right now feels too big for him, like he doesn't know how to deal with it, hasn't been prepared for it. So instead of saying anything else, he uses his hand on the side of Janus' face to pull them down into another kiss, trying to convey what couldn't be said. ]